Ice

Q. What's it called when you kick dropped ice cubes under the refrigerator.

A. Water under the fridge.  😜

Happiness

Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.  😜

Website

What is the longest website domain name? smiles.com because there is a "mile" between the s's! 😜

Hit

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.  😜

Memory

I went to see the doctor about my short-term memory problems. The first thing she did was made me pay in advance. 😜

Math Teacher

Math Teacher: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?"
Student: "A drinking problem." 😜

Bodybuilder

What do you call a Mexican bodybuilder who’s run out of protein?

No whey Jose.  😜

Who's Bigger?

Who's bigger Mr. Bigger or Mr. Bigger's son?
His son, he's a little Bigger. 😜

German Shepherd

I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog. 😜

Paranoid

Isn't it weird how when a cop drives by you feel paranoid instead of protected? 😜

Shoe Polish

What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? Every morning you will rise and shine! 😜

Big Bang

The Big Bang Theory: God Spoke and BANG! it happened. 😜

Ironic

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.  😜

Calendar

I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.  😜

Teacher

Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? There was no chemistry. 😜

Bicycle

Q. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up on its own?

A. It was two tired.  😜

CDO

I have CDO. It’s like OCD, but the letters are in alphabetical order LIKE THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE.  😜

Password

I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
😜